In today's American tradition, most women take on their husband's last name when they marry. With the rise of feminism, an increasing number of women keep their maiden names through marriage. I think that although this tradition is based on some notion of male superiority and ownership over women in our history, in modern times it is only significant if people choose to make it significant.
In a equal relationship between two adults, the woman taking on the husband's last name is simply a matter of tradition and does not necessarily signify any sort of male superiority, if they don't think of it that way.
On the other hand, if the relationship is such that the male presumes superiority over his wife, then the woman taking on the man's last name signifies a trend of male superiority and ownership.
A name may seem a trivial part of a human, and I believe that if a woman does not let the loss of her name affect her, it won't. But in many cases, a name can grow in importance to signify much more than just a word - a status, and an identity. In the case of Katherine, in Taming of the Shrew, when she loses her name by marriage, she also loses part of her identity as an independent woman.
In summary, I think that a woman taking her husband's last name is simply a harmless tradition - until it becomes more than that. A lot of times, a name becomes representative of that person's identity, and holding on to a name can be a very important thing.
Your post makes me wonder at what point does taking a different name become harmful. I agree with how a woman taking her husband's last name is done mostly because of tradition and is not harmful. But in the case of Petruchio and Katherine in The Taming of the Shrew, Petruchio's renaming of Katherine is harmful by altering and changing her identity. It is difficult to think about at what point does changing one's name become harmful. In my opinion, it depends on the person and relationship and what each person is willing to give up by choice for the relationship.
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